Pensamientos

While visiting the United States, I passed a milestone in my journey to Guatemala and God’s mission field – six months.  September 24, 2010.  Not that I remembered the significance of that day then, but in some ways I think it was fitting to be able to spend it in Colorado – that place which in itself was a milestone for me on the journey here.  Earlier this year before I could travel south to Guatemala, I went West to Colorado to embark on the final preparations, to examine the spiritual and practical elements of missions, of what it meant to thrive in another country.  How would I stay connected?  Who am I… deep down?  Is it even possible to belong to two cultures that are almost complete opposites?  Jesus did it.  Where is God in the transition?  He’s with me; I’m still in the transition. What does it mean to rest?

Six months later, I continue to ask myself these questions and others.  Not to be cliche, but there are always more new questions than answers.  I still wonder if I’m in the right place.  I think I am, but there are hard days when I feel ineffective and alone, unable to break down this bilingual and cultural barrier.  Unable to help people find new hope.  Then there are others when I feel accepted… by God and this community.  Yesterday was one of those days; today was too!  Praise God!  His grace is sufficient.

Since arriving last week, I’ve been directly faced with some of the other challenges of daily life here… i.e. MOLD!  To be fair, it was an especially rainy summer, but in a poorly insulated room that receives little direct sun and has been basically sealed for the past month, my battle with mold will be ongoing.  I would love for God to take away this constant annoyance… runny nose, slight congestion… but,  his grace is sufficient for me. As Paul writes in 2 Corinthians:

I appealed to the Lord about this, that it would leave me, but he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.’ So, I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities for the sake of Christ; for whenever I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Corinthians 12: 8-10

I am where I have been called for the moment, and that is what I cling to.  Thank you for your support and understanding.  We often reflect on the patience required to see real change and transformation.  We remind teams that a missions trip is not done to be able to take home a list of achievements.  It’s more personal than that… more relational… more spiritual.  I’m still growing and learning too, and God continues to speak through his word.

John 15: 16  You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide…

I have also found encouragement in the song “How He Loves” -

“When all of a sudden,
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realize just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.

Oh, how he loves us so…”

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